This week has been confusing to say the least but I have come to the realization that I will not be married to Brian anymore even if we do happen to get back together. Sadly even while medicated he tends to vary in his emotions and thoughts on things. So it’s hard to trust that he’s had any sort of change of heart especially when he’s had a bad day with the woman he technically wanted a divorce so he could date her.
So I think what needs to be worked on is being friends. I want him to have at least one person in his life that can help him and help him work through his emotions and crap. So I don’t mind doing that. Plus that’s good for Kaylee, being friends and all.
I do though have to separate myself a bit from it all because it can be emotionally draining in general. I think by being friends I’ll be able to protect myself from ever being put in this situation again.
Now my only hope is finding a job I actually enjoy. If I have to work I’d rather do it somewhere where I have fun and want to go there. I’d hate to be at a place where I’d be thinking about going home all the time. That would make it tough.